BDSM’s Role in My Mental Health Journey (Ep. 30)
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We’re delving into the intricate ties between mental health and BDSM as I share a very personal narrative that some may find unexpected—how BDSM has emerged as a beacon of hope in my journey with mental health.
IN THIS EPISODE
- Sharing my journey with mental health and how BDSM has provided a vital coping mechanism during my recovery process.
- Mental Health Awareness Month prompts a discussion on the overlooked aspects of mental healthcare in America.
- Breaking down the therapeutic benefits of BDSM.
- Discussing ketamine therapy as an alternative mental health treatment.
- Critical elements of BDSM such as communication and consent are examined for their importance in both mental health management and relationship health.
The Silent Battle: Living with Mental Illness
I’ve always believed in transparency with our community, and today I lay bare my battles with depression, anxiety, self-harming behavior, anorexia, suicidal thoughts, and a diagnosis that includes OCD and obsessive-compulsive personality disorder. These struggles aren’t just statistics or overused plot devices in movies; they have been, and for many still are, a reality that shapes daily life.
Growing up with a father who battled mental illness created a silent storm within our home and instilled a sense of inevitability about my own mental health. Mental Health Awareness Month is not just a warm and fuzzy social media post, but a reminder of the countless individuals who confront their shadows often without the support they critically need.
The Unconventional Lifeline: BDSM
As my life unfolded, BDSM presented itself as an unconventional lifeline amid the chaos. It might raise eyebrows, but BDSM—specifically the structured confines and rules of the Dominant/submissive dynamic—offered me a sense of control that I desperately needed.
Far from the misconceptions, BDSM isn’t about indulging recklessness or fostering harm; for me, it was about finding structure, understanding submission not as weakness but as power, and using the dynamic to channel my fears and uncertainties into something strengthening.
Shedding Light on Taboo: BDSM’s Therapeutic Edge
It’s time we talk about BDSM not as a taboo but as an area ripe for understanding—where communication, trust, control, and safety are not just practiced but revered. BDSM has shown me, and many others, therapeutic benefits that extend to stress relief, self-confidence, and empowerment. It provided a pathway to navigate through pain in a controlled environment rather than through damaging habits.
Medical journals and research are starting to illuminate this too, showcasing that practitioners often display favorable psychological characteristics and report a strong sense of well-being. Engaging in BDSM has not only normalized aspects of pain and control for me but also allowed for the development of deeper trust and the transformation of my experiences into something empowering rather than destructive.
Ongoing Self-Care: My Toolbox
Part of my commitment to mental health is my arsenal of ongoing self-care practices. Medication, exercise, maintaining a healthy diet, and journaling all play their roles in my blueprint for stability.
Regular scenes within the realm of BDSM bring grounding and mindfulness; they require me and my partner to be at our peak, not just physically but mentally. Prioritizing mental health means setting constants, whether it’s boundaries, aftercare, or just learning to breathe through a particularly spiraling thought.
The Interweaving of Lives: Jay and My Path to Healing
I cannot talk about my resilience without mentioning my partner, Jay. As my Dominant, Jay takes his role seriously—being the steadying force when thoughts begin to swirl and uncertainty creeps in. Educated and devoted, his approach redirects my attention from harmful ruminative habits to a focus on us, on the present, and on trust.
Medication, Therapy, and the Lockdown Effect
Throughout my life, I’ve experimented with different medications, therapies, and strategies to combat my mental health issues. The SSRIs, the mood stabilizers, the talk therapy—nothing seemed to really help.
Surprisingly, the lockdown during the pandemic brought contentment to my introverted self, and happiness seemed attainable. But post-lockdown, readjustment hit hard, with turmoil, self-harm, and a refusal to engage with life.
From Despair to Ketamine: A New Hope
In those darkest moments, Jay became a beacon, researching alternative treatments when traditional methods fell short. Enter Ketamine. A friend had mentioned it, but it remained a concept until desperation bred action. We learned that this treatment could be the reprieve we sought.
I’ll delve deeper into Ketamine therapy in a future discussion, but it’s worth noting that it’s not a street drug for us—it’s a medically sanctioned avenue providing a remarkable improvement in my mood with minimal side effects.
The Cost of Healing: Accessibility and Awareness
While I am one of the lucky ones who’ve found solace in ketamine therapy, it’s important to highlight the inaccessibility for many. Treatments aren’t cheap, and the cost becomes a barrier. Alternatives do exist, like Mindbloom in California, offering at-home treatment plans. Greater advocacy is needed to bring these options into mainstream consciousness though.
BDSM: More Than Just Play
BDSM, for me, is not merely about the scenes—it’s a psychological tapestry where my partner and I explore our limits safely and consensually, with constant communication. It’s a realm where we confront discomfort and work through it together, learning and growing in the process.
I extend my deepest gratitude for your support! If you’re intrigued or wish to continue this journey, consider subscribing for updates. Together, let’s keep the conversation going and break down the stigmas surrounding both mental health struggles and the lifelines we choose, unconventional as they may be.
Links From the Episode:
- Free Kink Personality Type Quiz
- Mindbloom
- The Journal of Sexual Medicine reference
- Archives of Sexual Behavior study
- Dom Sub Training course
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