• Skip to main content
  • Skip to footer

BDSM Training Courses

| Discover BDSM Classes & Relationship Training Online - Dom Sub Living

  • Home
  • About
  • Online Trainings
  • Mastermind
  • Blog
  • Free Resources
  • Contact
  • Student Login

8 Bondage Ideas + Tips Even if You’re a BDSM Beginner

Bondage is one of the fundamental aspects of BDSM.  It may seem like just a sex kink, but it’s so much more than rope ties, tying someone up, or being tied.  Real physical and emotional gratification comes from bondage.  How can you get started and enjoy it safely, even if you’re a beginner?  Here are 8 ideas plus tips to inspire you.

Bondage Bdsm Contract Ideas Beginner  Sex Tips  Rope ties Kink Tied up Tying up

Be sure to read all the BDSM safety tips first! Click here »

1.  Cable zip ties

I thought I’d start with one of my favorite ideas.  Zip ties are used to hold together cables or wires and are made out of a plastic-like nylon.  They usually come in clear or black and are really easy to use.  Simply put them around the wrists like handcuffs, thread the tail through the loop, and they’re locked.

I like them because they are super strong, and the material can cut into my skin when I struggle.  They can leave nice marks too.  The ties come in different sizes so make sure to buy the longer ones.  They are easy to get out of quickly because you just cut them to release them.

The only down side is that they are not reusable, but you can buy a lot of them really cheap, so they’re great for a beginner.

2.  Suit tie ideas

This is a really sexy way to enjoy bondage even if you are a beginner or in a vanilla relationship.  A man’s tie, made of silk or satin, is the perfect size and length to get started with bondage.

There are many ways to use one.  It can be used to tie the hands behind the back of the body, or in the front.  Once the wrists are tied, the Dom could tie the end to a bed frame or another piece of furniture.  It can also be secured around the sub’s neck like a traditional tie, and used as a leash to lead them around.

It’s versatile enough to be used as a blindfold or even a beginner gag.  Really the possibilities are endless.

3.  Spreader bar

Another fun piece of BDSM equipment, a spreader bar is used to keep the limbs apart.  It is usually attached to the ankles and the bar’s length is increased to open the legs wider.

Some spreader bars also have cuffs for the wrists too, so the hands are attached right next to the feet.  This gives the Dom easy access to do to the sub whatever they wish.  If the spreader bar has a key make sure beforehand that it works properly and it is within reach at all times.

4.  Handcuffs or Wrist Restraints

These can be really thrilling to use because they play into the whole “bad cop” fantasy.  Metal ones can be nice because they can press into the skin and give a masochistic sub more pleasure, but they can also be dangerous.  To avoid nerve damage, make sure you can fit two fingers under the cuffs.  If you’re going to be engaging in any kind of struggle play. I would recommend faux leather restraints instead.

As with all of the previous bondage ideas there are a lot of hand placement options.  They can even be hooked through something overhead like a clothes rod while the sub is standing.  Again, just be careful not to make them too tight because they could do some real damage.  And make sure the key works and is accessible.  No one likes to make an embarrassing call to a locksmith.

5.  Beginner Rope bondage tips

This is probably the best known tool for bondage and doesn’t require a trip to a sex store.  Rope can be used to tie a sub in lots of different positions.  “Hog tie,” where the hands are tied to the feet behind the back, makes the sub extremely vulnerable.

The best beginner rope is subjective, but I prefer smooth, usually nylon so it doesn’t chafe the skin.  If you like it to feel rough then I recommend a natural fiber like manila hemp.  In our bedroom we have ropes tied to the four corners of our bed at all times.  My Dom will use more rope or cable ties to attach me to the corners in various positions.

When we are done playing the rope can be tucked back under the bed out of sight and ready for the next play session.  People who enjoy being tied up in BDSM are usually called “Rope Bunnies”.

6.  Shibari/Kinbaku bondage

Shibari and Kinbaku are two terms to describe a type of Japanese bondage.  Although the words are sometimes used interchangeably they are actually two different things.  Shibari usually refers to general, artistic rope tying, while Kinbaku is a more sexual form of it.

Today you can see rope Masters performing intricate bondage styles at different shows and events.  The art is more in the ritualistic way it is done than in the finished project.  There are also many designs and techniques like the crotch rope tie, Strappado bondage (where the hands are tied behind and pulled up), and suspension bondage.

See a picture of me enjoying Shibari here.

7.  BDSM collar with “O” ring

My play collar has a big “O” ring on the front of it that can be used for many things.  A Dom could use zip ties, a suit tie, or ropes to secure the sub’s hands to the collar.  A traditional leash or chain can also be hooked onto it to keep the sub restrained.

Some collars have “O” rings in multiple places so the sub can be bound from the back of the neck too.  Look for a well made collar that is comfortable but strong enough to take a lot of pulling.  See more ideas for collars here.

8.  Tips for when restraints become undone

Sometimes, despite a Dom’s best tying skills, a restraint may come undone.  It’s going to happen.  There’s no need to be embarrassed, get frustrated, or end a scene.  If a sub notices that a rope is coming loose for instance they can just playfully say, “Master, I think my restraints need to be tighter.”

Or if a Dom sees that a sub is getting loose even in a rape play scene, they can stay in character and just quickly retie them.  The point is to just fix it without making a big deal of it, and to continue to enjoy yourself.

Hopefully I made your next trip to your local hardware store a little more interesting.  Obviously we just scratched the surface of BDSM bondage but these eight ideas and tips should get your creative juices flowing.  Have fun!  🖤

What are your favorite bondage ideas or tips?  Let me know in the comments.

Keep reading:  Using Safewords »

Share this article now:

  • Facebook
  • Twitter

Tagged With: BDSM, Beginner, Bondage, Ideas, Kink, Sex, Tips

Reader Interactions

Comments
  1. Cindy says

    March 27, 2020 at 10:20 am

    You left out the best one, mental or psychological bondage, where the Dom puts his sub into a position and tells her to stay that way. This is one of my favorite forms of bondage and really tests a subs resolve and desire to please her Dom and do as he commands. It can often be even more intense and satisfying than physical forms of restraint.

    Reply
    • Dom Sub Living says

      March 28, 2020 at 6:34 pm

      You’re so right, Cindy! One thing my Dom loves to do when I’m laying on the bed is for me to hold on to our headboard. I can’t let go, no matter what he does, or I get punished. It’s very intense to have to force myself to hold on.

      Reply
    • Roland says

      October 20, 2020 at 7:46 am

      Cindy has an excellent point a former submissive enjoyed a blindfold trip into the mountains of Wyoming. Allowing her an easy way to free herself l would leave setting up a campsite anywhere from a half mile to 5 miles. Wearing only her hiking boots and collar armed with a compass Lin would be challenged to find the campsite, she admitted how traumatic it felt at times yet felt a huge satisfaction in success. Be sure I never left her more than 400 meters out of sight, and was armed against the natural wildlife. Lin often remarked about the chance to commune with nature as the Lord intended, knowing protection was nearby but also the mind plays mean tricks at times.

      Reply
  2. Ali says

    June 12, 2020 at 3:12 am

    I think its a great idea to maneuver these hand full stuff with bondage. But I also strongly believe that it comes from inside. A slave from inside is like craving for an order. the soul remains restless until its ordered. That’s where it works out in real. I have seen in real that some one is very loud and bossy all in the world but in real trying to hide one thing only. That soul is searching for her master. Because after being realized her position she gets calm as if all the problems are solved.

    Reply
    • Dom Sub Living says

      June 12, 2020 at 4:07 pm

      Very true, Ali! Bondage can be very beneficial both physically and mentally.

      Reply
  3. Monica says

    July 30, 2020 at 7:04 pm

    Is it okay for a sub to purchase the type of bondage she desires?

    Reply
    • Dom Sub Living says

      July 31, 2020 at 2:34 pm

      Hi Monica! It would depend on the rules between the sub and the Dom.

      Reply
      • Ashley says

        August 13, 2020 at 9:26 am

        I agree that its up for my dom to decide what kind of purchase and practice for me. I’m a sub and I will wear or not to wear what he wants me in. Usually I start in just my panties, bra, and socks or thigh highs and let him take me from there.

  4. Eleise says

    August 25, 2020 at 3:19 am

    I have a question and I don’t want to ask my Dom. I am pretty new to this but to make this short, obviously I don’t have a collar yet, but what can I wear that puts out the message that I am a proud submissive but only to out world of BDSM?

    Reply
    • Dom Sub Living says

      August 27, 2020 at 7:52 pm

      Hi Eleise! You can check out this article for collar alternatives.

      Reply
  5. Michael says

    October 15, 2020 at 7:58 am

    Really interested in a spreader bar. Can anyone recommend a good one?

    Reply
    • Dom Sub Living says

      October 15, 2020 at 7:25 pm

      You can check out my recommended list in Lesson 7 of Dom Sub Training.

      Reply
  6. Sasha says

    October 21, 2020 at 3:15 pm

    I am reading this article, as I am a newbie to the lifestyle and I would love to try this with my partner, but I am very concerned about the first suggestion for bondage: Cable zip ties! I have read many, many articles saying that cable zip ties AREN’T supposed to be used during bondage sessions because of the material they have, and the fact that they can cut your blood circulation off, causing lots of pain, discomfort, and in some cases even life-threatening injuries (especially if they’re on your wrists and/or ankles!)

    Please forgive me if I am incorrect on this, but I don’t know if I could use cable zip ties. I do appreciate your suggestions and I might try the other ones when I’m able to. Thank you!

    Reply
    • Dom Sub Living says

      October 21, 2020 at 6:38 pm

      I’d be happy to explain, Sasha!

      A lot of beginner sites will caution against using zip ties mostly for liability reasons, but they are completely safe if used correctly. (Police departments even use them after all)

      The risk lies in the fact that they can “cinch”, but as long as you don’t pull on the tail during play it is fine. But even traditional handcuffs can cinch.

      Also due to the material, if you struggle a lot it can cut into the skin more, but some masochistic subs actually love that. So it’s really a personal preference.

      With all restraints however (even rope), you want to make sure you can fit 2 fingers under them, have a good pair of safety shears nearby, and check for circulation issues.

      I hope this helps! Have fun!

      Reply
  7. Miguel says

    June 28, 2021 at 6:34 am

    Hi everyone,
    Reading this article and all the replies has helped me tremendously. My wife and I are new to the lifestyle and are constantly looking and learning new things that we love. She loves to be strapped down and flogged. I enjoy doing that and after the flogging I have a feather duster kind of thing I use to help relax her body. Do you recommend and good floggers?
    Thanks
    Miguel

    Reply
  8. Danny says

    July 8, 2021 at 5:06 am

    I am vanilla as a dom can come is it possible for me to jump into my subs old training or do I need to retrain em

    Reply
  9. Ria says

    May 1, 2022 at 10:53 pm

    Hello, me and my partner are new the lifestyle. I love the idea of a collar outside of the bedroom but my partner does not like them outside of it. Any suggestions? Thank you 🙂

    Reply
  10. Serveatop says

    November 8, 2022 at 8:55 am

    I am a submissive Tgirl that luvs to be tied up and vulnerable for my aggressors to use to satisfy their desired pleasures. Adding a blindfold increases my anxiety even higher for the fact of not knowing what is to occur next. One other restraint that can be applied to add suspence it ear plugs of ear muffs. You are totally unaware of your aggressors next action which lifts your anxiety even higher.

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Footer

About Me

 I’m Alesandra from Dom Sub Living.  Through online trainings and mentoring, I help new and experienced Doms and subs live the BDSM lifestyle to the fullest.

Subscribe to Blog via Email
  1. HOME
  2. ABOUT
  3. ONLINE TRAININGS
  4. MASTERMIND
  5. BLOG
  6. FREE RESOURCES
  7. CONTACT
  8. STUDENT LOGIN
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Twitter
  • YouTube

Copyright © DOM SUB LIVING, LLC

Privacy Policy | Terms | Contact