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Relationship Articles + Tips

BDSM relationships can be extremely unique and complicated, to say the least. Whether you’re currently in a dynamic with someone, or just want to prepare, these articles will help you master a BDSM relationship.

BDSM Submissive Punishments: How to Punish Your Sub Effectively

Tips for submissive punishments

Most Dominant/submissive relationships in BDSM usually have varying types of submissive punishments. Correction (even over text) is needed from time to time when they break the rules. However, many Doms struggle with ideas for knowing how to punish a sub. Here are some tips to keep in mind for a submissive punishment, and we even […]

Tagged With: Discipline, Dominant, Ideas, Long-Distance Relationships, Punishments, Submissive

Beducated Review – Plus Coupon Code!

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As a Dom/sub couple, my partner and I are always looking for ways to explore our sexuality and improve our intimate relationship. One of the resources we’ve found incredibly helpful in this regard is Beducated. Keep reading for my complete Beducated review, and also get your coupon code for a subscription discount. My Honest Beducated […]

Tagged With: BDSM, Beginner, Ideas, Kink, Online, Relationships, Review

How to Write a BDSM Contract + Free Printable BDSM Contract Template

BDSM Contract

Have you considered adding a new layer of structure and reliability to your BDSM dynamic? Well, then you’ve come to the right place! It’s always a good idea to have a BDSM contract before you begin any new Dom/sub relationship. It spells out in detail what is expected of each person. It also keeps things safe […]

Tagged With: BDSM, Beginner, Ideas, Relationships

How to Be a Submissive in BDSM: Ultimate Guide on How to Be a Good Sub

How to be a submissive in BDSM – submissive training guide: Learn how to be a good submissive in BDSM

Like anything in the power dynamics of an exploratory sex life, fulfilling a role can truly be transformative. It can set aside preconceptions or other baggage and let you and your partner whisk each other away to a world of untold pleasure. And it can help you tap into deeper needs and desires than you […]

The Ultimate BDSM Checklist for Kinks, Limits & More

(Free Printable Kink Checklist!) When you’re engaging in the kink lifestyle, it’s important to have a BDSM checklist. You probably already have a basic BDSM kink list that you found when you first began your journey. However, it’s essential to have one that is reputable and comprehensible. A good kink checklist will also help you […]

Tagged With: BDSM, Beginner, Dominant, Examples, Ideas, Kink, Relationships, Submissive

Mastering Dominance: An In-Depth Look at the Different Types of Doms

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In the world of BDSM, Dominants play a pivotal role in guiding and leading their submissive partners. But did you know that there are different types of Doms with distinct approaches and styles? Examples can include Primal Dom, Gentle Dom, Part-Time Master, and Kinky Dom (just to name a few). In this article, we’ll explore […]

Tagged With: BDSM, Beginner, daddy dom, DDlg, Dominant, Examples, Kink, Relationships

Age Play Unleashed: DDlg Rules, Rewards and Punishments for Littles

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Daddy Dom/little girl (DDlg) relationships are a subculture of BDSM. They often involve age play, where one partner takes on the role of a “little” and the other that of a caregiver. Within this dynamic, there is usually a set of DDlg rules for littles, chores, and even DDlg punishments and rewards. In this article, […]

Tagged With: DDlg, Ideas, Kink, Punishments, Relationships, Rules

A Beginner’s Guide to BDSM & Dom/sub For Starters

BDSM For Beginners Guide

Many people who are curious about kink want to know the quickest way to get started and learn BDSM. When you’re just a BDSM beginner, it can be really frustrating to try and figure out what a Dominant or submissive is all about.  If you don’t get started the right way, you’re going to waste […]

Tagged With: BDSM, Beginner, Dominant, Guide, Submissive

The Importance of BDSM Education

BDSM education

A BDSM relationship is a consensual dynamic that involves elements of power play and sensory experiences. Taking a “How to learn BDSM class” can be a lot of fun and a great way to explore your sexuality, but it’s important to approach this lifestyle seriously and with safety in mind. In this article, we’ll explore […]

Tagged With: BDSM, Beginner, Dominant, Kink, Relationships, Submissive

Introducing BDSM Training: Dom Sub Training Courses

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If you subscribe to Dom Sub Living elsewhere, then you may have already heard about my new BDSM course, “Dom Sub Training”.  Either way, I wanted to formally introduce it to everyone here on the blog. I’m really excited about this! Creating the BDSM Course Back when I was trying to decide what kind of course […]

6 Effective Safewords BDSM Couples Need With Examples

Ever since Fifty Shades of Grey, the meaning of “safewords” has become more popular.  But many people, even in the BDSM community, still don’t know how to pick a safe word or use it correctly. BDSM safewords are codes to communicate when a submissive is at their limit or close to it, and I’ll show […]

Tagged With: BDSM, Definition, Examples, Fifty Shades of Grey, List, Safewords

10 Self-Care Tips Doms and Subs Need

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Many in the BDSM community are responding to the current crisis in one of two ways. They either push themselves to try to keep things under control, or they retreat into worry. In either case, self-care gets neglected, and Dom and sub drop can occur. Yet this is exactly when you need self-care activities the most. […]

Tagged With: Activities, Dominant, Ideas, Kit, Self-Care, Sub drop, Submissive, Tips

Topping from the Bottom: What Does Topping from the Bottom Mean?

Topping from the Bottom

What does “Topping from the Bottom” mean? Ever since the book 50 Shades of Grey made the expression popular, the meaning and actual definition have become cloudy. In BDSM, the definition of “Topping from the Bottom” (or TFTB) is when a submissive starts to become more of the dominant in the relationship.  I’m going to […]

Tagged With: Definition, Examples, Fifty Shades of Grey, Phrases, Submissive, Topping from the Bottom

What is DDlg? Daddy Dom/little girl Ultimate Guide

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What is DDlg?  Keep reading to learn all about the rules, definition of “little space”, Daddy dominant traits, and get new ideas, so you can enjoy ageplay responsibly. 

Tagged With: Ageplay, Daddy, daddy dom, daddy little dynamic, DDlg, ddlg rules, Dominant, How to be a good Daddy, Little girl, Little Space, Rules, what is DDlg

Fake Dom vs Real Dom: 9 Warning Signs

Fake Dom vs Real Dom red flags

In creating Dom Sub Living I’ve met many great Dominants, but I’ve also come across a lot of fake doms.  I have also heard from many submissives about their scary experiences with bad doms.  I eventually realized that a “Fake dom vs Real Dom” article was necessary. Keep reading to learn the warning signs, red […]

Tagged With: Dominant, Fake Dom, Red flags, Submissive, Traits, Versus, Warning signs

BDSM Rituals & Why You Need Them

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BDSM rituals are an important part of any healthy Dom/sub relationship. They help the Dominant and submissive remember their roles and can be a way to stay centered and focused. But creating powerful and easy Dom/sub rituals (that don’t fizzle out) can be challenging. Read on to discover proven examples of D/s rules and protocols, […]

Tagged With: BDSM, Dominant, Examples, Ideas, Protocol, Rituals, Rules, Submissive

7 Things You Need to Know About BDSM During This Uncertain Time

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Last week my inbox was flooded with questions from my members… “How can we avoid going back to vanilla while we’re stuck at home?” “Should I keep looking for a partner?” “Should we take a break from BDSM since the kids are off school?” “How can we stay Dom & sub while we are separated […]

The Ultimate 24/7 Total Power Exchange Relationship Guide

Ultimate TPE Relationships

Are you a Dominant or submissive, eager to make the BDSM lifestyle a 24/7 agreement?  Maybe you already have a contract, but you now want a full-time dynamic.  Total Power Exchange relationships, or TPE relationships, are sometimes seen as the ultimate goal in a BDSM lifestyle. While they can enhance your role as Dom or […]

BDSM Limits Explained

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Limits are a topic that is sure to come up in any Dom/sub relationship or contract negotiation. Even if you don’t have a BDSM partner yet, it’s good to have clear BDSM limits and boundaries so you’ll be a prepared Dominant or submissive. But what exactly is the difference between hard BDSM limits and soft […]

How to go from Vanilla to BDSM and Kink

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One of the questions I get asked the most is, “How do I go from vanilla to BDSM?” (The definition of vanilla is plain, normal, or boring.) Maybe the person read the book 50 Shades of Grey, or wants to incorporate kink into their relationship or sex life to bring more meaning to it. It […]

Tagged With: BDSM, Definition, Kink, Sex, Switch, Vanilla

How to Be a (Good) Dom – The Ultimate Guide

Sexually dominant dom man

In BDSM, “Dominant” is a word that’s thrown around a lot.  Being a Dom can seem very appealing.  Most are people who want to be more dominant sexually in bed, but also in their relationships and personal life.  Unfortunately, there are a lot of fake doms out there.  How can you make sure you’re not […]

The Only 2 Submissive Collar Types You Need

If you’re a Dominant or submissive in a D/s relationship, you’ve probably wondered about BDSM collar etiquette and meaning. After all, there are so many different submissive collar types for different situations: consideration, sub training, posture, play, everyday wear, pet, protection, ownership, ceremony, and eternity, just to name a few. So what is a day […]

Tagged With: BDSM, Collars, D/s, Relationships, Training

What is a Switch in Bed? The Guide to How to Be a Switch

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What is a “switch” in bed? When most people think of a BDSM relationship, they usually only think of the Dominant and submissive roles (typically a guy and a girl). The truth is, there are many shades of gray on the kink spectrum. Many people (even vanilla ones) enjoy being what’s called a “switch,” and […]

Tagged With: BDSM, Definition, Dominant, Kink, Relationships, Submissive, Switch, Vanilla

7 Rules for BDSM Long-Distance Relationships

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BDSM long-distance relationships are hard, especially for those that are Dom/sub. It can be difficult to keep the dynamic going when you’re apart, and problems and issues arise. There’s also a lot of bad advice and tips on the internet. But even if you’re apart for just a day, or if circumstances make it so […]

Tagged With: Dominant, Guide, Ideas, Long-Distance Relationships, Relationships, Rules, Submissive, Tips

How to Master BDSM Maintenance for Doms & subs

Sub maintenance spankings submissive Dom

When a Dominant or submissive starts a BDSM relationship, they’re usually very excited and motivated. But after some time passes, the realities of life begin to set in. What can keep a sub eager to serve and also prevent a Dom from neglecting their partner? BDSM maintenance!  When you hear that term, you may think […]

Tagged With: Dominant, Maintenance, Spankings, Submissive

5 Essential Scene Strategies for Your Next Play Session

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If you’re new to the lifestyle, or even if you’ve been playing for a while, you’ve probably wondered during a scene, “Am I doing it right?”  (The definition of a scene is a BDSM activity or encounter that involves a Dominant and submissive. It may also be referred to as “play” or “session.”) Well, I […]

What is BDSM CNC Kink? Consensual Non-Consent Explained

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One of the most debated but rarely explained topics in the BDSM community is consensual non-consent. The real definition of this type of D/s relationship is one of deep trust, not abuse. And even though the CNC sex fantasy is pretty common, CNC kink/CNC fetish are still a taboo topic. Let’s look more closely, including […]

Tagged With: BDSM, Consensual Non-Consent, Contract, Definition, Examples, Ideas, Kink, Relationships, Sex

10 BDSM Aftercare Tips & Ideas for Dom/sub Couples

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During a BDSM scene or other kink activities, the Dominant and submissive can experience a huge endorphin rush, which can be a shock for both when the scene ends. BDSM aftercare is needed after the scene is over because it’s a way for those in a D/s (Dom/sub) relationship to calm back down. If your […]

Tagged With: Activities, Aftercare, BDSM, Checklist, Definition, Dominant, Ideas, Kink, Kit, Relationships, Sub drop, Submissive

The Ultimate Guide to a Safe BDSM Lifestyle

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In the BDSM community there is a saying: Safe, Sane, Consensual, or SSC. Whether you are new to the Dom/sub lifestyle or have been playing for a long time, this is the foundation for any D/s relationship. You should always follow these three principles and so should your partner.  But what does Safe, Sane, Consensual […]

Tagged With: Beginner, Bondage, Consensual Non-Consent, Contract, Fake Dom, Safewords

8 BDSM Bondage Ideas & Tips for Beginners

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Bondage is one of the fundamental aspects of BDSM. It may seem like just a sex kink, but it’s more than rope ties, tying someone up, or being tied. Real physical and emotional gratification comes from bondage. How can you get started and enjoy it safely, even if you’re a beginner? Here are 8 beginner-friendly […]

Tagged With: BDSM, Beginner, Bondage, Ideas, Kink, Sex, Tips

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