Whether you are just curious about BDSM or you have been playing for a long time, you have probably encountered many myths about it. Below are some of the top ones debunked. These were originally featured in the newsletter for “Dom Sub Living” and more will continue to be added.
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Myth: Real subs don’t have safewords
FACT: If a sub is new to BDSM or coming into a new relationship, it is a huge red flag if they say they don’t have safewords. Safewords build trust and bring meaning into the relationship. Be comfortable using them and you will experience greater pleasure.
Myth: BDSM is always sexual
FACT: During scenes it is not uncommon for there to be no sexual contact with the other person. Also many find gratification in the nonsexual aspects of rituals and ageplay.
Myth: Ageplayers are Pedophiles
FACT: Pedophillia is having sexual feelings towards children, and a sub is a consenting adult. For example, a DaddyDom wants to be with HIS little girl, not little girls in general.
Myth: A person who is dominant or submissive in life will prefer that role in BDSM
FACT: People who are dominant in life will sometimes take on a submissive role in the bedroom, and vice versa. It’s normal to want a break from being how you are at work or in your day to day relationships.
Myth: People who practice BDSM have multiple partners
FACT: People who practice BDSM can be monogamous, polyamorous, or whatever they want to be. Not everyone who’s interested in a kinky lifestyle has multiple sexual or relationship partners. Many are looking for a long-term relationship, or just want to play with their current partner.
Myth: Switches are usually bisexual
FACT: Switches can be straight, gay, or bi. Just because a person likes switching between Dominant and submissive roles, doesn’t mean they like switching their sexual orientation.
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