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Most people have an idea of what a 24/7 Dominant and submissive relationship looks like. They think of titles, collars, or maybe kinky scenes in a dungeon. But today, I want to take you behind the scenes and out of the playroom to talk about the weirdest things I really do for my Dom, day in and day out.
IN THIS EPISODE
- Learn five truly unusual things I do daily as a 24/7 submissive (yes, even kink veterans are surprised!)
- Explore how tracking intimate moments can actually boost your mood and relationship harmony.
- Learn why consensual phone restrictions and location sharing can strengthen a Dom/sub dynamic.
- Learn what it means to train your body and follow physical position rules outside of a scene.
- Uncover the secret thrill (and practical tips) of wearing bondage gear under everyday clothes.
Are These Really Weird, Or Just Unique to Me?
When you’ve been practicing 24/7 for as long as I have, people assume nothing shocks you anymore. That’s just not true. The world of power exchange is full of surprises, and I still get messages from fellow kinksters that make me stop and think, “Wow, that’s different!”
Whether you’re a newbie or a seasoned Dom or sub, keep in mind: there’s no one-size-fits-all version of “weird.” What might seem extreme to one couple could be totally normal for another. And what matters most is that everything is safe and consensual.
Ready for my laundry list of odd? Here’s what my real-life D/s looks like, beyond the bedroom.
1. Tracking My Orgasms Like Medicine
You’ve probably heard of people tracking their cycles, but in my dynamic, we track my O’s. Yes, every single one.
My Dom and I discovered that my releases are actually a better predictor of my mood and mental health than my menstrual cycle ever was. If I go too long without one, I get irritable, disconnected, and the whole energy of our relationship suffers.
This isn’t just a fun quirk; it’s a scheduled and documented routine. I use the cat-with-heart-eyes emoji in my calendar for every orgasm. My Dom knows the ideal interval and keeps tabs on it too. It’s not just whenever we feel like it; it’s a serious maintenance schedule to keep our power exchange healthy.
If you think this sounds obsessive, know that even my psychologist agreed: for some people, sexual release functions just like medicine in managing mood and wellbeing.
And I’m not the only one. I know submissives who log intimacy, scenes, and even track their mood alongside sexual activity. This data removes guesswork and helps both partners see patterns and anticipate any emotional rough patches.
2. Phone Restrictions and Location Tracking
Tech can be a powerful part of a D/s dynamic, and my Dom takes it seriously. He has set up restrictions on my phone, limiting when and how I use social media and even enforcing an official “bedtime” for my device.
This isn’t about control for the sake of control. I struggle with screen addiction and procrastination, so these boundaries actually help me serve more fully.
We both share our locations, too, which, for us, is mostly practical. We’re married with kids, live in Los Angeles, and need to know where everyone is at any given moment.
But the restrictions on my phone are different. They’re part of my submission. Only my Dom knows the passcode, and I can’t override them even if I try- a safeguard against my own bratty nature.
When I’m with vanilla friends, I just say my husband helps me with my screen time. What I don’t say is: every minute I’m mindlessly scrolling, I’m not serving him or becoming a better submissive.
3. Training My Body, Inside and Out
Exercise is a must for everyone, but as a 24/7 submissive, my training goes far beyond jogging or weightlifting.
I use specific tools (like Ben Wa balls) and practice pelvic floor exercises to make my body more responsive and pleasurable for both myself and my Dom. Sometimes he’ll assign tasks like wearing them for an hour, or send a message to check if I’m following through.
It doesn’t stop there. I do gag reflex training, pain tolerance exercises, and other types of conditioning, most of which happen privately, on my own. Bizarre? Maybe. But building these physical skills makes me feel empowered and better able to handle whatever my Dom asks of me.
A lot of submission happens when no one is watching, quiet self-improvement for his future benefit.
4. Following Physical Position Rules (Even Outside Scenes)
This one surprises a lot of people, even other educators. In our dynamic, physical position isn’t just about kneeling when a scene begins.
I often sit on the floor at my Dom’s feet while he’s on the couch or wait for permission to sit down when he enters a room. It’s subtle, but these physical gestures remind me of our roles, no matter how ordinary the setting.
I grew up in a household where sitting on the floor was normal because there wasn’t enough room for everyone on the furniture. So these habits came naturally to me. Now, they’re a conscious part of my submission. If you want to try this, invest in a nice rug or pillow; your knees will thank you.
Worried guests will judge you? In my experience, nobody outside your relationship knows what these rituals mean anyway. Let it be your secret.
5. Wearing Bondage Gear Under My Clothes
Here’s the weirdest, and most fun, one: I often wear bondage gear under my regular clothes, even for mundane errands like grocery shopping. Sometimes it’s a rope harness or thigh cuffs, sometimes clamps, always something that feels private and connected to my dynamic. For me, it’s as comforting as a weighted blanket.
It’s a secret signal to myself about who I am and who I serve, even in the most vanilla places. Sometimes my Dom chooses the piece I’ll wear so that I am reminded of him all day.
Side note: I always laugh thinking about what my grandmother used to say: never leave the house without clean underwear in case you’re in an accident. She had no idea what I’d be hiding under my dress in adulthood!
Why We Embrace the Weird
So, what’s the real lesson here? “Weird” is subjective. These rituals might seem strange on the outside, but for us, they’re essential to our connection and growth. Kink isn’t just about the exciting or taboo. It’s often built from small, unseen acts of intention and devotion.
Remember: living as a submissive 24/7 is about more than scenes or titles. It’s about all the strange, sometimes laugh-out-loud, little things we do to stay connected and empowered. With kink, the ordinary becomes extraordinary.
Do you do something even weirder? I’d love to hear about it! And if you want to start your own journey or up your sub game, grab my free How to Be a Good Sub cheat sheet below:
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