What does “Topping from the Bottom” mean? Ever since the book 50 Shades of Grey made the expression popular, the meaning and actual definition have become cloudy. In BDSM, the definition of “Topping from the Bottom” (or TFTB) is when a submissive starts to become more of the dominant in the relationship. I’m going to […]
Definition
How to go from Vanilla to BDSM and Kink
One of the questions I get asked the most is, “How do I go from vanilla to BDSM?” (The definition of vanilla is plain, normal, or boring.) Maybe the person read the book 50 Shades of Grey, or wants to incorporate kink into their relationship or sex life to bring more meaning to it. It […]
What is a Switch in Bed? The Guide to How to Be a Switch
What is a “switch” in bed? When most people think of a BDSM relationship, they usually only think of the Dominant and submissive roles (typically a guy and a girl). The truth is, there are many shades of gray on the kink spectrum. Many people (even vanilla ones) enjoy being what’s called a “switch,” and […]
What is BDSM CNC Kink? Consensual Non-Consent Explained by Embracing Trust and Connection.
One of the most debated but rarely explained topics in the BDSM community is consensual non-consent. The real definition of this type of D/s relationship is one of deep trust, not abuse. And even though the CNC sex fantasy is pretty common, CNC kink/CNC fetish are still a taboo topic. Let’s look more closely, including […]
10 BDSM Aftercare Tips & Ideas for Dom/sub Couples
During a BDSM scene or other kink activities, the Dominant and submissive can experience a huge endorphin rush, which can be a shock for both when the scene ends. BDSM aftercare is needed after the scene is over because it’s a way for those in a D/s (Dom/sub) relationship to calm back down. If your […]